Life with the Potters
by carrie.bennett.585
Summary: Severus Snape lives through the war,and finds himself living in the most unlikely of places. He will have to face his past and present, and find a new reason to live. and I do not own Harry Potter. The M rating won't come into play until later, and I also do not own the Severus Snape mysterious ticking noise Potter Puppet Pals song. I also do not own the character Gregory House.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1 life with the potters

A cry rose from upstairs creeping down to the basement where I stayed. "Potter quiet your mewling spawn!" I yelled up the stairs, but I got no response. "I mean it Potter some of us are trying to do something productive with our time." I added trying to goad the new father into shutting up the kids. I growled in irritation, and got up from my chair. I pushed it in roughly and stomped up the stairs. There were no signs of life in the house other than the screaming infants on the upper floor. The door from the basement leads into the brightly lit kitchen, and it takes me a minute to adjust to the change in lighting. I give a groan of frustration as though someone had just opened up curtains on a particularly sunny morning.

I look to the round oak kitchen table and find a note lying there. I pick it up my eyes roving it. I crumple it up, and toss it in the dust bin in anger. "It would have been nice if you had told me I may have to play nursemaid to Lupin's cub, and your temperamental brat." I curse Potter through gritted teeth. 'Probably won't wake up, fat chance of that. Of course even the next generation will have to torment me before they are even eleven years old.' I mutter to myself the whole way up the spiraling staircase. I arrive on the upper floor, and head towards the nursery. A black cat darts out of an open doorway nearly tripping me. I give the detestable creature a kick, and it runs down the hallway and stops at the end of it to give me a death glare.

I arrive outside a white door that says 'Be wary of flying bludgers, and open it slowly. The walls are painted a light blue with white puffy clouds. A snitch darts from wall to wall, and cartoon Quidditch players conduct a game. The seeker on the team goes from wall to wall looking for the Snitch, and even catches it on occasion. This would be entertaining in and of itself to watch if not for the screams emitting from the oak cribs against the wall. I make my way over and peer down reluctantly at Potter's child. I sniff to make sure it isn't the child's diaper, and am relieved to smell nothing foul. "Hey… you…boy…." I say hesitantly. He looks up at me, and quiets for a second, and then resumes kicking his feet and screaming. I get his attention again, and start to make funny faces at him. He screams all the louder. I give up on him, and head to the adjacent crib. I sniff once again, and am once again relieved to find no presents.

I start the face routine, and once again am met with loud screams. This time though there are a few differences. Lupin's cub starts imitating my facial features, and even I have to admit I am impressed with the imitation of my scowl. He had even added a hooked nose. I try to fight the subtle lifting of my lips, but fail. 'Disrespect already though. He will be even worse than those who came before.' The screams get even more earth shattering and I close my eyes. I sigh and pray for patience. My ears tune into the ticking clock hanging on the wall, and I begin to hum under my breath.

The humming turns into a catchy tune, and I begin to sing "Snape, Snape, Seeeeverus Snape." over and over, and to my surprise the wailing stops. I open my eyes peering into both cribs. To my utter shock they are listening as if enjoying such a stupid little ditty. "Do you like that James?" I ask Potter's son in a disbelieving way. I start up again, and am met with a baby giggle. I cringe in semi disgust, but keep going. 'Anything to make the crying stop I suppose.' I continue for about 10 more minutes until both boys are back to sleep. I hear a quiet chuckle coming from the doorway.

Potter is standing there with a cat who got the cream expression. "I never thought I'd see the day…." I cut him off before he has a chance to say anything more.

"Not a word Potter." He gives an evil little laugh, and whispers "Word." I growl, and shove my way past him, activating the billow charm on my cloak.

"You know that cloak billowing thing doesn't work on me anymore right Severus." I stop and turn around giving him the best sneer that I can. His smile only widens "Ginny says we are on our own for dinner by the way. She is working late. George is having another bad day at the joke shop. "

"By bad day you mean George is having a grief session with a bottle of fire whiskey." I say wanting to cut right to the chase. The smug look leaves Potter's face, and he affixes me with a glare that is supposed to make me feel bad, and in a way it kind of does. Despite what I know he is thinking. I do understand the temptations of the bottle for me and fire whiskey have been friends many a night.

"Just go back to your dungeon you stupid old bat." I flip him the bird, and march through the kitchen slamming the door behind me. 'Why did I ever take his offer of a place to live?' I ask myself as I sat back down in my chair. 'I wasn't even supposed to live through the stupid war.' Granger; being the insufferable know it all that she is. Shoved a Bezoar down my throat, and applied a muggle healing solution for snake bites, and made to close my wounds. I had been close to death a few times, and believed I would not make it through regardless. I had even given Harry my memories so that he would know the truth. I had been looking forward to my Earthly suffering being over, but I'm still here. What I don't know is why. My home in Spinner's end had been ransacked and destroyed after those loyal to the Dark Lord realized I was a traitor. Truthfully I didn't really have a place to go, but why here?


	2. Chapter 2 Snape meets House

The events proceeding the war are kind of fuzzy too me. I remember lying there on the floor. I closed my eyes and thought death had taken me, and the next time my eyes opened everything was dark. I could only make out the blurry outlines of faces. Everyone was talking in hushed but urgent voices. "Doctor his eyes are open!" One of the doctors said in complete surprise. My eyes adjusted, and I began to see everyone in the room more clearly.

"There is no possible way he's alive." The doctor said incredulously. He shoved two other doctors aside, and glared down at me. "Well Merlin's beard. He is alive." The doctor turned his face away from me, and clapped his hands getting his staff's attention "Well don't just stand there everyone time to get Severus Snape out of the morgue. "

One of the nurses gave a shy little cough, and said "Umm excuse me doctor, but there are no rooms left." She looked down at her feet studying the ground. Her long red hair fell in curtains around her face. "Lots of causalities from the war you know." The rest of what she said retreated into mumbles.

The doctor stroked his goatee, and looked up at the ceiling. "Well we could put him with Lockhart…" He stared down at me as if asking me what I thought of this arrangement. I coughed and spluttered trying to find my voice.

"No not him. I refuse to stay with Gilderoy." I gritted my teeth preparing myself for the most annoying return to life there ever could be. Then I added "And how about we start talking about me as if I were in the room." 'These dunderheads annoy the cuss out of me. They are worse than my students.' I looked around at their faces, and caught the eye of a blonde doctor with shaggy hair, and a goofy grin on his face. 'In fact I know that one was my student….but didn't he get a poor in potions…. Probably Dumbledore's doing…..' My inside cringed a little bit at the thought of Dumbledore. 'He'll never be there to interfere with my life again…..' At one point that would have filled me with immense joy, but even I knew as the wizarding world tried to rebuild it would need Dumbledore desperately. I shook my head now was not the time to get all sentimental.

"Well it's either Lockhart, or the Longbottom's." The doctor said shrugging his shoulders in an annoying way. He had a smirk upon his face that even I had to admire. The corners of his mouth lifted up mischievously "Personally I would take Lockhart if I were you." I sneered at him, and he folded his arms clearly quit pleased with himself that he had the gift to annoy me.

"Well hop to it." I narrowed my eyes at the doctor. "Do hurry up with my torment. I would suggest keeping all sharp implements away from me because I might either try to do myself or Gilderoy in." I had no sooner gotten the words out as a hot sharp burning made its way down my throat. I began to wheeze, and things were beginning to go blurry again. I felt a wet trickle down my neck. I clenched my teeth together trying to fight a yell of pain from escaping. The pain became too much, and I drifted back into unconsciousness. I woke up once more when I felt something wrap tightly around my throat.

A roll of spelled bandages was wrapping itself tightly around my neck trying to stem the blood flow. The pressing of the cloth on my neck made me want to howl in a way that would have made Lupin proud. I knew I was out of the darkly lit morgue. I soon realized that I had entered into a bright room with millions of eyes staring down at me. They all had unsettling smiles, and winked down at me every once in a while. Thankfully I heard loud snores from the bed adjacent. I relaxed a little thankful I wouldn't have to deal with the real thing just yet. I moved my head to study the other side of the bed, and saw the doctor looking at me like I were an interesting science project or something.

He had cold blue eyes, and seemed to be dissecting me in some weird way. I met his gaze with a raise of my eyebrow. I noticed he had a cane next to him. It was black with red flames on it. 'I wonder what happened to him.' I tried to focus on anything else, because I didn't like the way he was looking at me. It felt like he was preforming some kind of weird Legimens on me, but I knew he wasn't. "So see something you like…."

"I'm trying to figure out how you survived." He didn't spend anytime mincing words. "No one survives a snake bite like that." He stroked his goatee reflectively. "So how did you?" Those eyes just kept boring into me looking my body up and down as if it would give him the answer. "There is the bezoar, there are snake bite treatments, but there is no way those would be enough to keep you alive." He didn't give me a chance to answer his question. He grabbed his cane, and started prodding me all over my body. I yelled out in pain when he hit particularly tender parts. My eyes even started to glaze over when he got to my throat.

"What was the point of that?" I asked in a deathly whisper. I wanted to throttle the man, especially when I saw his eyes light up in amusement. I clenched and unclenched my fists. I looked at this man with all the hatred I could muster. He was clearly unwilling to tell me what the point was of prodding me, and causing me further pain.

"Lilith he is gonna need pain killers once every two hours, and his bandages changed every three." He grabbed his cane, and used it for support as he got up out of the chair. He limped out of the room wordlessly. The nurse came, and made me drink my pain potion. I felt its effects almost instantly. I began to laugh hysterically at nothing in particular. The nurse sat with me for a while, and asked me questions about what had happened. I found myself talking about the students at Hogwarts and how stupid they were.

"They call me the greasy bat of the dungeons." I lowered my voice to a whisper "But what they don't know is I'm dun dun dundundundun baaaatmaaaan" 'I probably should stop babbling. I hate babbling.' The rational part of my mind tried to tell me. The nurse politely patted my arm. She clearly didn't get the Batman reference. 'It's kind of sad no one in the wizarding world seems to watch muggle television.' "What Potter and Weasely especially don't know is that Ford Angelia is my batmobile." I chuckled myself into complete and peaceful oblivion.


End file.
